Tuesday, April 07, 2009

Is the Pity-Party BYOB?

Tonight I will leave work at about two in the morning. After a few hours sleep I'll get up at around seven and take Kristin to work. Then I'll go back to chemo at 9:30 a.m. and sit in the chair for three or five hours depending on how things go.

The last week or so has been pretty hard. I've been a little on edge. I keep getting an invite to my own little pity-party and marking it return to sender. But it gets a little more tempting to open it each time.

God's grace is sufficient for me. I'm holding tight to it. He's given me peace about my wife and parents being taken care... comforted.

God's mercy strengthens me. I'm holding tight to it. I don't want to say goodbye. But when the time comes, I know I'll be able to.

I've talked to a lot of people about joy lately. That we have to choose joy in our lives and our days. I need to be clear and say that the joy I'm choosing does not come from any strength I have but from what God gives me. The book of Nehemiah says that, "The joy of God is my strength!" It is clearly, to me, that joy that keeps me going.

Please don't forget the fund-raiser at Papa's Pizza on Thursday, April 16th. You get to eat pizza and I get to keep creditors at bay for a little while longer. You need a flyer to help. One can be downloaded/printed here.

Thank you all for your continued support. I really do need it. Please continue to pray for my wife, Kristin, and my parents.

The other day I found myself singing an old song by a group I was raised on, The Hinsons, called By The Time. Here's the chorus:
By the time they find me missing, I'll be living over there.
Where there is no reminiscing of the sorrow we have down here.
And by the time they look around them and discover that I'm gone,
I'll be in that final chorus singing round the Master's throne.


Hedy said...

Hi Aaron! It's the girl formerly known as Heather McIver. Ruth gave me the link to your blog, and I just have to say that I really, truly admire your attitude, strength, and faith through this situation you have been dealt.

I can't begin to fully know or understand what you are going through at all, but please know that my whole family is thinking of you right now.

And also... don't be too hard on yourself! Be gentle with yourself! This is quite a burden that has been placed on you, and if you need to take breaks from joy and feel/explore the other valid emotions that pop up, I know everyone will understand. These are not mild circumstances, my friend.

Your family and friends all love you. You are one amazing person.

Please let me know if there is anything at all that you and Kristin might need!

Much love,

Heather Bartleson

BigDaddyChris said...

Imtrying to organisea pizza party for my whole cub scout pack and it will be at your pappas function, that oughta help some.

I think about you every day. I got a stupid chain mail thingy today where you get one wish. I wished for you to be healed.

I dont know what else to say, I suck at this. I just went through it with my mom and I'm not getting any better at it.

write me back dammit!